Say Something
by RonaldGarcia91
Summary: One Shot: Post CoLS, Simon and Isabelle never have tell each other how they really feel and she is ready now but where is he¿?


**Oh Hi people, how are you, let me tell you something real quick, My first lenguage is not english so now you know why if you find some mistakes and stuff like that... i tried my best to make it for you, hope you like it...**

* * *

**Say Something.**

SCARED that's how i am now.

I don't really know what to do with this i'm feeling,_ I'M Isabelle Lightwood FOR CRYING OUT LOUD_!, i know better than this, but i can't stop to have this void feeling that is inside, killing me slowly, and is all because of one horrible and scumbag mundane, well he is not horrible nor mundane for the matter but still i hate him cause of what he is doing to me; i cant stop thinking about him everytime I'm away in the institute or in a mission, i wonder what he is doing, where he is, and when I'm with him, i found myself lost in his brown and perfect eyes that seem to look through my soul and...

_-"I'm LOST"_

_-"DAMN i'm completely and absolutely lost!",_ i fell for him, this vampire that once was a human and one of the most annoying people i met; at first i wanted to play with him, i used to teased him a lot, making him blush with every little complement i meant to him but suddenly that change he teases back and started to change he wasn't scared of our world anymore, he started to understand things and because of that and the love for a girl that didn't loved him back destroyed him, but still he kept coming with us to our fucked up world where he didn't belong… then the biggest change came.

He DIED.

_-"Yes he died"_, i reminded myself that, it felt like it was centuries or millenias ago but no, it were just a few months back, i remember seeing his limp body on the stairs in front of the institute doors and i immediately froze to the view. Ii started shaking but i reminded myself that this happens everyday... people die _-"But he didn't deserved to die this way"_ i recalled thinking to myself…. then we found ourselves on a cemetery ( a Jewish one), it was the first time i was in a place like that, i tried to keep myself together, i tried to show no emotions but it was hard as i watched Raphael digging his grave , as i hear his best friend incessant crying but i couldn't ... i heard Raphael saying the grave was ready and i stand up from where i was, i was beside his body i felt like i didn't wanted to leave him alone... he didn't deserved to be alone; i watched as Raphael put his body with incredible tenderness in the grave and covered it with dirt, Clary pass besides me and we all stood there waiting in an awkward and mourning silence until i couldn't take it anymore; everything that had happened that day overwhelmed me and i turn to Clary and told her that maybe that wasn't a good idea that he was better off dead but she didn't take my advice well, she was about to snap at me, maybe she was going to yelled at me telling me how selfish i was, that i didnt care for him, that i was a bitch like she previously called me but she couldn't cause in that moment he started to rose from his own grave.

Clary immediately went to his help and i was frozen i felt like everything was frozen in time and was moving so unbelievably slow, i watched like Simon yanked at Clary like she was a pray, his eyes full of anger and hunger like a lion before attacking his most precious food, i hear someone calling me but i didn't know who it was_, i think it was Alec but if i tell you the truth i really didn't care_, in that moment my whole body felt like an iceberg and my veins were cold water beginning to freeze. I watched in daze as Clary tried to get away from him and i was more alarmed cause of what i was thinking... i was thinking that... that she deserved it, she deserves to die because Simon had died following her cause he loved her_..._

_-"OMG what a horrible thought i had back there"_ but seeing it now that was me... being jealous because that little red head had someone that cared about her so much that actually died for her and i wanted that, i wanted to have or feel like someone was there for me as she had someone for her.

I remember that after the cold have been lifted of my body we escort Simon to Luke's house and my heart felt to the ground when Simon practically went to crawl in a corner and started to cry cause he tough a light bulb that was turn on suddenly was the rays of sunlight... Once we leave and went back to the institute i walked directly to my room without saying a word to anyone and throw myself in my bed, took my pillow and i started to sob, i was crying like a baby and i was crying for him, because he had died and then he was alive but as something else and the moment that hit me the most was seeing him lying on the floor crying blood, the trembling look on his eyes scared, embarrassed, confused; he was alive that was Right but as something inhuman, _-" it was still him_", i knew and know that, but holly shit in that moment i was fucking scared;i cried myself to sleep and then i made a promise to myself to be the same i was, i promise to never fall for anyone cause _-"Hearts are breakable"._

* * *

HEARTS ARE BREAKABLES Those words hunted me for so long… i never let my guards down, but as time went by i let them fall... for one person and he took my walls and destroyed them with a huge, immense hammer the size of a three store building and i let him, i let him do it and it feels amazing...

* * *

Now I'm here sitting in his room waiting for him, i need to tell him how i feel, i haven't told him yet, I'm pretty sure everyone thinks we are together but we're not, we haven't tell each other how we feel i think because i was too scared to let him know and he hasn't told me cause he is scared I'm playing with him _-"but how, he can not see how i feel?, why is he so insecure?"_ ... I talked to Clary once about this and she told me that he had his heart broken once (because of her) and since then he finds too hard letting his emotions go so that's why he hasn't told me but i know he feels the same way...

I walk around the room a room that i know so well now, it has a king size bed in the center, the wall is cover with poster about movies that he and i watched together eventho i didn't understand most of them he was too nice to me and explained them... I looked myself in the mirror i'm wearing my gear so that means I'm cover in leather, my whip wrap around my arm like a serpent, i didn't put on too much make up, i know he likes me more when I'm natural, I'm walking around, nervous my palms are sweaty and i feel like i wanna vomit and he is not coming_._

_-"Where is he dammed"_.

I walk around the apartment, Jourdan hasn't even appeared yet i've been here for like 2 hours and no one has came, i tried to called him and it send me to the voice mail, i'm starting to worry and decide i'll go find him myself when i hear a loud and impatient knock on the door.

-"SIMON OPEN UP, SIMON DONT BE STUPID DONT DO THIS". I walked to the door worry cause what i've just heard and open the door.

-"Dont do what?", i asked a little to loud, Clary is standing in the other side of the doorway his eyes red from crying.

-"Isabelle" she whisper and i stand in there watching her as she starts crying again and i'm confused and scared now.

-"Clary, what happened, is something wrong?"

-"He's gone" she tells me

-"What? Clary what's wrong, i don't understand"

-"Simon, S.. Simon is gone, i found this on the institute entrance". I noticed before that she was holding two pieces of paper she handed me both on them and i read her name in one and in the other i read my name in a cursive and beautiful hand writing and i know is his... upon reading my name i froze, i felt my veins turning ice and i start reading, Clary watching me her expression destroyed, i start trembling while i'm reading and i think out _loud -"He cant do this to me, not today, not now"_

-"He's gone" i heard Clary telling for what it felt the thousand time

-"SHUT UP" i snap at her -"he must be here around somewhere, maybe Magnus's or his mother house"

-"I went looking for him everywhere and this is the last place, i couldn't find him i even called Raphael and he told me he hadn't seen him and told me it was better that way... gone from everybody, i wanted to punch him so bad.. I.. i don't know what to do".

I put out myself of my daze and rub a tear that is crawling it's way down on my face...

-"We are going to find him, and i'm going to kill him no one disappeared on me no matter if it's to keep me safe, We'll find him and i for the angel going to kill him myself". I put the letter on the table and Clary and I make our way outside the house, inside i feel like dying, i never got the chance to tell him how i feel but he knew and i know he feels the same way, before we leave the apartment i go to his room and go directly to the night stand i open the first drawer and there it is a band that`s gleaming with the light of the sun that goes through the room, i took it and put in my jacket pocket and walked out along with Clary and now i have only one tough in my mind when i find the bastard i'll kick his ass and then i'm gonna be with him i know now i wanna spent the rest of my life with him...

* * *

**_Simon's Letter_**

_I'm a coward i know i am... I'm leaving and i letting you know by this... This is the most and absolutely fuckin worst way to say goodbye but i know if i see you I'm not gonna be able to do this cause i'll be lost in your essence that vanilla and cinnamon smell that drives me crazy every time and right now i can swear i smell it i can feel like you're here with me..._

_I have to leave, if i stay my family, Clary and YOU mostly YOU are going to be in danger, i cant loose you i cant loose anyone because of me if some of you get hurt I'll be lost and I'll go crazy... so for me this is the only way..._

_I wanna tell you something though you should know altho i think you already knew..._

_I LOVE YOU_

_I Love you Isabelle and that's why this is so hard even when i writting, i don't wanna leave but i don't have much choice i preffer sacrifice myself than sacrifice others, I'm Gonna fight i swear to GOD i'm gonna fight whoever is hunting me, whatever is trying to hurt those i love I'm gonna fight and I'm gonna WIN for YOU to get back to your side, to your arms, to your body, to your lips TO YOU._

_One more thing I'm going to do this and i ask for you to do something for me... don't go looking for me, it's dangerous and i don't want to see you get hurt, i want that you have your life and if when i get back you are with someone else I'll be happy either way cause I'll know you are happy, don't wait for me that's what I'm asking do not wait..._

_I want you to have something... i hope is your liking... go to my room in Jourdan's apartment open the first drawer on the night stand and you'll see what it is... It's a promise Izzy a promise of my love to you..._

_I LOVE YOU ISABELLE SOPHIA LIGHTWOOD AND I ALWAYS WILL_

* * *

**_So let me know if you guys liked it or not :)_**


End file.
